Tobin's Story:

On Tuesday, June 15, 2010 I received a phone call from my OB's office. The doctor explained that there were some concerns they had with my ultrasounds. They were seeing "red flags" that indicated there could be something wrong with our baby. We were then scheduled to meet with a specialist that Friday. The next couple of days felt like the longest days of my life. Friday morning we first met with a genetic counselor. She went over what they were seeing in my previous ultrasounds and what they would be looking for in the ultrasound I would have after we talked with her. Basically there were two things that they were looking for: Down Syndrome or Trisomy 18. She went over what each of those meant and answered the questions we had. We then went in for the ultrasound with the specialist. The specialist came in and explained what they were seeing in the ultrasound: 2 vessel umbilical chord, cysts on the brain, extra amniotic fluid, clenched fists, a cleft lip and clubbed feet. As he went over each thing my heart broke and I wept. When the ultrasound was finished we met with the specialist in his office and he shared with us that he believed our baby had Trisomy 18 which meant that our baby was incompatible with life. He gave us the option to terminate the pregnancy. There was no way we were going to do that. We loved this sweet baby and wanted to show him that love and make the most of his life whatever that may be. We scheduled an amniocentesis test for Friday, August 20th. This would confirm if he had Trisomy 18 as well as confirm the gender of our baby. The specialist prayed with us before we left.

I remember thinking August seemed so far away, but when August 20th came it seemed so quick. I was extremely nervous about the test, but it went rather quick and smoothly. On Monday, August 23rd (Dave's Birthday) we received the preliminary results of the amniocentesis. They did in fact find 3 of the 18th chromosome. Our baby had Trisomy 18. They also shared with us that we were having a baby boy. Dave and I held each other and wept. How could this be?!? After officially hearing the news Dave and I decided we needed to come up with a name for our son. We wanted it to have special meaning. It took us about a week to decided his name: Tobin Kendall. Tobin meaning "God is Good" and Kendall being Dave's grandfather's name and his father's middle name. We truly believed and continue to believe that God Is Good and wanted others to know that.

On Monday, September 6 after a few days of not feeling any movement from Tobin, Dave and I went in to the hospital for a non-stress test. I prayed so hard that God would allow us to hear Tobin's heartbeat. The nurse continued to move the Doppler around on my belly searching for his heartbeat. She explained to us that she wasn't confident enough to tell us that the heartbeat she was hearing was mine or his and so she would call our doctor to have an ultrasound done. Our doctor came and did the ultrasound. After a few minutes of scanning he showed us where Tobin's heart was and explained that there was no heartbeat...Tobin had passed. We decided to be induced the next day. Tobin arrived Wednesday, September 8, 2010 at 4:06am. He was 2lbs 1oz and 12.5inches long. He was so beautiful and I cherish every moment we had with him.

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Trying to find just the right words to say to share with everyone the joys and fears I have recently experienced has been extremely difficult.  Our journey has been one that we never imagined we would take.  We have seen God work in our family in ways we never believed possible.

The Lord has recently blessed our family with a 5th member!  Yes!  We are expecting our 3rd baby!  We are thrilled and scared all at the same time.  I have found that I have had a reserved/held back joy in this pregnancy.   There will of course be an anxiety that hangs with me until I hold this precious baby in my hands for the first time.

I met with my OB doctor, Dr. Cree for the first time on Monday.  God has blessed me with such a wonderful Christian doctor.  I expressed that I was having and would continue to have anxiety throughout this pregnancy because of what happened with Tobin.  Even though I know the chances of having a Trisomy 18 baby occurring more than once is extremely slim, I still fear it.  He comforted me and prayed for and with me and for our baby.

At the appointment we were going to listen for our Baby's heartbeat.  As Dr. Cree moved the doppler around on my belly waves of memories and emotions overcame me.  My mind raced back to when at my first appointment with Tobin we didn't get a heartbeat and that made me nervous and then that dreadful day when we found out that our sweet Tobin Boy was in the arms of Jesus.  Dr. Cree couldn't get a heartbeat which of course was not good for my anxiety.  We thankfully had an ultrasound scheduled for today.

My mind raced and nerves were high right up until the ultrasound this morning.  The moment we saw our baby's arms and legs moving around there was a calming relief that came over me.  Tears of joy streamed down my face.  The ultrasound technician told us our baby looked perfect and is growing right on track!  Praise the Lord!

We appreciate all of your prayers and encouragement.  They have been such a blessing in our lives.  I will do my best to keep you updated on this pregnancy and how things are going.  For now I have had lots of morning sickness, Michaela loves to "see the baby in Mommy's tummy", we think about our Tobin Boy daily and wish he was here with us.
I am now the Mother of:
Michaela 03/19/2009
Tobin 09/08/2010
and
Expected Baby 11/01/2011
(If I was looking on the outside in I would think I was crazy) :)
I couldn't be more proud of my precious babies!
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3 comments:

  1. LauraApril 13, 2011 at 12:04 AM

    Congratulations Bethany! Praying for a beautiful pregnancy and thankful that God has blessed your family with another sweet baby!

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  2. A Mommy's WorldApril 14, 2011 at 8:20 PM

    Bethany!! Hurray! I am so excited for you and your family. God has a plan for this little one and for your family! Rest in Him. HUGS!!!

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  3. Mrs. VApril 16, 2011 at 12:24 AM

    most wonderful post! bethany you are a strong woman and you have walked through everything you have been through with grace and beauty. i am praying for you and my family will pray alongside me as you await this precious baby to be born. november is a good month for a baby!!!! ;)

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